Life doesn’t always go as we imagine, right? We think we’re in control—steering the ship, calling the shots—but then something throws us off-course, and suddenly, we're in uncharted waters. Ever feel like you had the *perfect* plan, and it fell apart faster than you could say, “But God, really?” Trust me, you’re not alone. For me, the past few months have been pretty difficult. It hasn’t been easy to say “God, I thank You” when things feel so hard. Let’s dive into how we can trust God through life’s disappointments, laugh a little along the way, and find some peace in letting go.
1. Remember: God Sees the Bigger Picture Sometimes we have that “I know exactly what I’m doing” confidence. But God? Oh, He sees the whole iceberg when we’re just admiring the tip. Isaiah 55:8-9 reminds us of this: “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways, declares the Lord. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts.” In other words, while we’re mapping out our five-year plan, God’s up there holding the entire universe’s blueprint. So maybe we don’t get the dream job, or that relationship doesn’t work out. It’s disappointing, but when we understand that God’s “higher ways” are at work, it’s easier to relax a little. (Or at least less stressful than Googling “how to make life go according to my plan.”) 2. When in Doubt, Be Honest With God One of the most comforting things about God is that He’s okay with us being real. No need for formalities—if you’re frustrated, let Him know! King David was a master at this. In Psalm 13:1-2, he basically says, “How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?” It’s just like when you text someone and see they read it but they didn’t reply, except David knows God’s always listening. God’s not scared of our disappointment, so take it to Him. Tell Him about the things that didn’t go as planned and the dreams you’re wrestling with. When we bring our raw, unfiltered feelings to God, He meets us right where we are. No judgement. It’s kinda His thing. 3. Find Joy in the Unknown Let’s be for real—finding joy when your feelings are crushed sounds crazy. But there’s actually freedom in trusting that God’s got it under control, and it can lead to unexpected joy. Romans 8:28 (my favorite Bible verse) reminds us, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” Now, study the text! “All things” includes those disappointments, too! It doesn’t mean everything turns out exactly how we wanted. Sometimes, it means learning to laugh at our grand plans and say, “Guess I didn’t know what I was doing after all!” God’s way isn’t just different; it’s often better than we could ever imagine—even if we can’t see it right away. And usually… we don’t. 4. Keep Moving Forward. Baby Steps. God’s timing can feel slower than waiting for a package that’s “out for delivery,” but it’s always right on time. Proverbs 3:5-6 gives us the ultimate direction for these moments: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” Trusting God’s plan doesn’t mean you’re on an instant path to understanding. But as you take steps forward—even when you can’t see the full road ahead—He’ll guide you, sometimes in ways you didn’t expect. Life throws us some pretty hefty disappointments and sometimes, all at once. But when we remember that God’s ways are higher, that He’s okay with our honesty, that joy can bloom in the unexpected, and that He’s guiding us step-by-step, trusting becomes a little easier. So go ‘head—hand over the steering wheel, put away your 10-step plans, and maybe, just maybe, take a breath. God’s got this. And you’ve got Him. Amen??? Amen.
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This piece includes scripture references that are optional, but encouraged if you don’t mind referencing the Holy Bible.
As I get older, few things can beat a good nap. Especially an after-church nap on Sunday afternoons! There was a time I was convinced that engaging in physical rest was something only lazy and unmotivated people do. I have worked for leaders who believed that I should be on-call for them while taking personal time away from work. I thank God for time and wisdom! Don’t get me wrong… I believe many of us have had a time in life where we needed to grind. The grind may have called for late nights, long work days, and not much rest. But that should be a temporary stage. It simply isn’t sustainable for a healthy life. Something I once borrowed from a friend was the practice of not having a television in the bedroom. At first it was odd to me because how am I supposed to binge from bed?? The idea is to create a space where your mind and body know it is time to rest and relax. Watching television in bed isn’t bad and I’ve since returned to having a TV in my bedroom, but it is primarily for background noise and not entertainment. Read Psalm 127:2. Not only do our bodies need, crave and require rest, but so do our minds. Some of us have lived enough life to know and understand that peace of mind is so precious! Sometimes we have to shed some things to get to that place (read more about that here → SHED) . But, Friend… it is absolutely worth it! I can tell you when my mind is at ease I sleep better. I create more. I am flat out happier! One thing I struggled with was understanding HOW to get peace of mind. A few practices that have helped me include (but certainly not limited to):
At the end of the day, the day is gonna end, but will you be rested in your mind and body? I won’t dare allow you to believe that I’ve mastered this practice and am an expert. However, I can proudly share that I’m working to do better because I know better! Take your rest, Friend. Get my latest merch piece HERE to let people know you believe in physical rest. Purchase your I Just Wanna Talk journal and get the thoughts out of your head, Friend! This piece includes scripture references that are optional, but encouraged if you don’t mind referencing the Holy Bible.
Breaking up is hard. Breaking up with a job, a person, or habit is a very difficult process that could leave trails of grief, confusion, and even anger. In 2024 I’ve tried to break up several times, but I’ve found the undertaking to be challenging. How do I explain what is happening to others? What will people say or think? As I have said before, at the end of the day, the day has got to end…and so does my relationship with the Shuns. On August 19, I started my day listening to a podcast from The Table with AO. The notice of the new episode dropped into my inbox on August 16, but I knew this was one I wanted to be attentive to, so I saved it. Two “Shuns” presented themselves simultaneously and unexpectedly. Procrastination (Read Hebrews 12:11 in your preferred version of the scriptures). If you’re new here: Hi. I’m La’Kendra and I am a professional procrastinator. This was the first “Shun” I experienced listening to that podcast I previously mentioned. Procrastination - in my simple definition - is delaying the completion of a task. Since I can recall, I have been a procrastinator in many areas. I tend to say things like “I do my best work under pressure”. Or “you know diamonds need the pressure to be their best”. And because I kept receiving A’s on those late night papers, I believed this was true. I’ve matured enough to know that I did good work under pressure, but it was never my BEST. Friend, the truth is when I took my time to study for an exam, properly plan out my writing (not applied to a single blog post) and even put laundry away immediately it is just better. It feels better to have completed something knowing that I really gave it my very best and not just a half-hearted effort. Let me admit, this has been the hardest Shun to break up with! I keep going back to it like a drug. Which is a great un-planned segway to…. Addiction (Read Galatians 5:16 in your preferred version of the scriptures). (Before I go in, for those who are fighting addictions to drugs, alcohol or other harmful substances or behaviors, I pray you will seek out and find the help you need so you may be released from these things.) I wish I had healthy addictions. I wish I was addicted to salads that only had natural ingredients and non-creamy dressings. I wish I was addicted to water. I wish I was addicted to exercise. That is NOT my portion. I believe we are all addicted to something. I don’t know if there is a secret sauce to this Shun but have resolved that the key for me is to have as many healthy addictions as possible. In my head, more healthy addictions will cancel out my bad ones. That is La’Kendra-Math, and I don’t really suggest you subscribe to how I think. Nevertheless, I do believe it is wise to consider what addictions you have in your life and if they are healthy for you. If it is unhealthy, I highly suggest breaking up with this Shun. An honorable mention goes to: Hesitation (Read Genesis 19:26 in your preferred version of the scriptures). The Shun that tries to hold us back from greatness. Hesitation kept me from blogging again. It said, “Nobody wants to read what you have to say!” Hesitation may be keeping you from starting your business or going back to school or trying a new hairstyle. Hesitation tends to grow from fear and can keep us stuck in a place or mindset we don’t want to leave. Don’t be like Lot’s wife. Leave hesitation this very moment and don’t look back! Conviction (Read James 4:17 in your preferred version of the scriptures). A Shun we all need so don’t break up with this one! This is what some of you felt reading the previous paragraphs (sips figurative tea). It settles down when we are confronted with the truths behind our actions or inactions. Conviction is that feeling of “I should have…” and usually shows up after the fact. Now let me clarify… “I should have cussed him/her/them out…” is not quite what I’m talking about HERE, but I acknowledge that is a real thing and for another day. This Shun springs forth from not doing what thus says the Lord (for me). The podcast I mentioned at the beginning convicted me about my eating addictions. It made me think twice about having an apple fritter I had JUST purchased. I still ate the fritter, but I promise I was convicted while I chewed! I believe conviction connects your heart and brain in a moment of “we know better than this”. Like, I literally think my heart looks up towards my brain and says “Now, B…” and my brain is like “Before you even say it, you’re right”. What have you been convicted about recently? Let’s reflect: Can you relate to any of these Shuns? How are you breaking up with it/them? Finally, friend, unlike a podcast, I don’t know if anyone reads my blogs until you reach out. I’m not phishing for numbers. However, if you did read this, please share your feedback with me! If anything I have shared resonated with you or you felt conviction, please share the post with others! Let me start by saying: I don’t like snakes. TO ME… every snake is dangerous and harmful. Because if I see a snake, my life is automatically in danger due to the harm I may cause trying to get far away from it!
A few months ago, the Holy Spirit released the word “shed” to me. On August 12, 2024, the term “let go” was a recurring phrase in my hearing. Then the Holy dropped the ecdysis process on my heart to illustrate all of this and I want to share it with you, friend. Shed. 2 Corinthians 5:17: “...old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new” (NKJV) I was sitting in my church prepping for worship service when the word came to me clear as a sunny day. I would love to tell you I immediately went into prayer seeking God’s guidance on why He gave me that word. I stopped the task I was in the middle of, scrunched my face, and said “Well, what does that mean?” I immediately received the instruction to shed grudges, resentment, grief, and jealousy. None of these things serve me a positive purpose so there is no need for me to hold on to them! Why do we hold on to old emotions and situations? What good does it serve? Now walk with me… When something is ‘shed’ it is removed. When a snake sheds its skin, it removes parasites that may be harmful to the host. Once the skin is shed, does the snake pick up the dead, parasitic skin and carry it around? After snakes shed their skin, they may take a swim in a nearby body of water to ensure all of the skin is removed. The new skin is often vibrant and fresh looking. No matter what, they always slither away and leave the shed behind. They let go. Let go. Isaiah 43:18-19: “Do not remember the former things, Nor consider the things of old. Behold, I will do a new thing…” (NKJV) Once something is shed, it needs to be let go or released. There is no need to carry that baggage around with you. Can you imagine being around someone who carries their dirty laundry around with them everywhere they go? Imagine the stench of clothing that has since been shed, but not let go. The more laundry that is added, not only does the load get stinkier, it also becomes heavier. What have we learned? Once we identify a non-serving emotion or mindset, we should be intentional about shedding it and letting it go completely! Make room for the new! This was a much-needed word for me and I pray it may help someone reading this. Writing is definitely something I’ve had a heart’s desire to do more of. I don’t fancy myself a bestselling author or to have a blog garnering millions of views. Heck, I’m not all that great at writing. However, I appreciate the opportunity to express and share in different ways and really wanted to do more blogs in 2024. I wanted to engage with readers and extend the conversations to my podcast. Welp…we can see how that has turned out. But yet here I am. And I thank my friend Dr. Christi Culpepper-Walker for the inspiration to LEAN INTO MY MAGIC. At the end, I’ll tell you how you can learn more about this, too.
I stopped promising myself that I would lose weight in the new year. Traveling is always a desire, but life be life’n. Since I use paper towels like I move bricks (sell drugs), saving money is always on the list. If you are like me, you probably have goals or intentions you want to achieve in 2024. If you are also like me, things happen and you may have lost focus of your goals. What this year has taught me so far is that it is okay to fail. Now I don’t want the overachievers to attack so let me share my thought process. My faith tells me Jesus was the only perfect being ever to walk the face of the earth. As such, that lets me know that I am destined to have imperfections and, thus, failures. That may not mean much to you, but this thought set me all the way free! Friend, I want you to be free, also. Whatever you set out to do in 2024 is not totally off the table. There are 4 good months to take a step forward towards completion. I think sometimes we (myself included) get too caught up in the desire to reach a goal within a specific timeframe or not wanting other people to think ill of us for not getting it done by a certain time or age. I recall very vividly a former acquaintance scoffing because I had not completed my bachelors degree in the time they felt was needed. I mean like rolled her eyes and all! In the moment, I felt small and behind schedule. When I think back on the matter today my thought is more like: ma’am… are YOU paying for these classes and studying for these exams?? I digress. Whatever you set out to do, will be done whenever you finish it. Because at the end of the day, the day’s gotta end. All I’m saying here is to not give up on achieving your goal even if it does not come to completion until 2026. Something else I have leaned into more in 2024 - and am continuing to learn and practice - is freedom in authenticity. I’d be a bold-faced liar if I had you to believe I have lived my whole adult life in authenticity. If you’ve ever code-switched, you, too, would be a bold-faced liar. Working in corporate business, it’s not always inviting for Black-American women to show up as our authentic selves. From our hair to our facial expressions, EVERYTHING gets analyzed and criticized. This reality is not limited to the work environment and extends to relationships, online personas, and so much more. What I want to focus on here is the freedom to be authentically wrong. You’re probably wondering what the heck I mean. Don’t overthink this (as I typically would do). In my world, lots of people come to me for answers, resources, and guidance. Most of the time I have a solution. But I had to allow myself permission and space to be wrong or not have an answer. There was a time I was ashamed for not knowing or for even being incorrect. Baby, again, I am not Jesus THE Christ! So why would I put so much pressure on myself? Childhood trauma? Possibly. But now that I know better, I strive to do better in that area of my life. If this feels like a random rant, I can’t say you’re wrong. How-be-thee-ever, ever-thee-be how… what can you lean into for the rest of the year? What can you give yourself permission to be free from eternally? As for me, I’m going to eat my snacks, swing my locs, and be authentic. If you want to know more about the MAGIC I’m learning from Dr. CC, visit her website HERE and consider joining us in Baltimore for the 2025 Free Before 40 Conference. This conference is open to ALL women of ALL ages. Virtual options are available and I do not think you’ll regret it! Check out my IG page for the 2024 recap video HERE. Photo cred: Hunter Scott Images
**WARNING** Spoilers are all up and through this episode. If you have not seen the 2023 movie and have a desire to do so, please do not engage with this episode yet!
I am so excited to have my girls Amanda and Kareena with me to chat about all things ‘The Color Purple’. The book… the original movie… the 2023 release. We are talking about it all! ** You can watch me talk on YouTube now!! Check it out here: https://youtu.be/-QTaw92vPfs ** As always, continue the conversation! Find me on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and YouTube by searching my handle @LaKendraSpks – email me at [email protected] – or visit my website (and purchase some IJWT merch): www.LaKendraGarrison.com. Intro and outro sounds are from The Production Team, Maestro Tommy Polynice, and his sister, Judy! If you need musical talent, hit up the Maestro at [email protected]! You can also follow him on all social platforms: @MaestroPolynice.
**You can watch me talk on YouTube now!! Check it out here: https://youtu.be/_zn2FSdvFpU?si=XrqfRddkO70Y1a4G **
Baby, I’m back!! Did ya miss me?! I missed talking to you! Get into this dope conversation with Coach Shinese Collins and how to reach our goals in 2024! Pre-order Coach Shinese’s new book: https://bit.ly/shatteredsilencevvvpre, follow her on IG: @iam.ShineseCollins, and check out her website: shinesecollinsunlimited.com! As always, continue the conversation! Find me on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and YouTube by searching my handle @LaKendraSpks – email me at [email protected] – or visit my website (and purchase some IJWT merch): www.LaKendraGarrison.com. Intro and outro sounds are from The Production Team, Maestro Tommy Polynice, and his sister, Judy! If you need musical talent, hit up the Maestro at [email protected]! You can also follow him on all social platforms: @MaestroPolynice.
** You can watch me talk on YouTube now!! Check it out here: https://www.youtube.com/@LaKendraSpks/podcasts **
The IJWT Podcast is making a video debut!! And in this episode, I truly just wanna talk, friend. May is Mental Health Awareness Month. For this episode, I am being transparent and letting you in on my own emotional rollercoaster with the sincere hope that I can help someone. As always, continue the conversation! Find me on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and YouTube by searching my handle @LaKendraSpks – email me at [email protected] – or visit my website (and purchase a journal): www.LaKendraGarrison.com. Intro and outro sounds are from my friend, Maestro Tommy Polynice, and his sister, Judy! If you need musical talent, hit up the Maestro at [email protected]!
Hey, ya’ll! I know I said my last episode was my final one for 2021, but ya’ll…. I would be remiss if I did not address these most recent matters! Let’s get into it really quick!
As always, continue the conversation! Find me on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter by searching my handle @LaKendraSpks – email me at [email protected] – or visit my website (and purchase a journal): www.LaKendraGarrison.com. Intro and outro sounds are from my friend, Maestro Tommy Polynice, and his sister, Judy! If you need musical talent, hit up the Maestro at [email protected]!
Hey, ya’ll! I hope you enjoyed your holiday and showed kindness to yourself and others. Let’s have a brief chat about loyalty and celebrity limits, shall we?
As always, continue the conversation! Find me on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter by searching my handle @LaKendraSpks – email me at [email protected] – or visit my website (and purchase a journal): www.LaKendraGarrison.com. Intro and outro sounds are from my friend, Maestro Tommy Polynice, and his sister, Judy! If you need musical talent, hit up the Maestro at [email protected]! |
AuthorLa'Kendra D. Garrison |